An 8-Step Vagina Manual For Those Not In Possession Of One

Having a healthy sex life is also very elegant.

Thought Catalog

Look, guys, I don’t blame you for not always knowing about vaginas. They’re complicated. Beautiful, but complicated. I would have directed this to everybody but as I have seen in my own experiences with lesbian sex, people who own one tend to know how to handle one. And so, I present to you, a user’s manual for the vagina if you are not in possession of one:

1. It does not want to be poked or prodded.

This isn’t like an arcade game. You don’t hit it enough times and then, whoop! You’ve won! There’s the orgasm! It needs some tender, passionate loving. It needs to be caressed in the right places, with steady speed and pressure.

2. Tongue, people. Tongue.

If you ask a girl what she wants and she’s like, oh, I don’t care, allow me to translate this for you: to stick your tongue all up in…

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9 Counterintuitive Rules For Happiness

Being happy is definitely elegant.

Thought Catalog

Happiness might just be a state of mind—but there are concrete things that give you a better shot at being happy. If you’d like to stack the odds in favor of your own bliss, here’s a cheat sheet.

1. Men: get in a relationship, women: get out of one

The Chicago Sun-Times took a survey and found that the majority (78%) of men would remarry their spouses while another study found that only half of women would do the same.

When men get into a relationship they get something they don’t already have: sex and someone they can talk to on a deeper level. Women already have this. Sex is much more readily available for women than it is for men and they can talk about everything on the face of the earth with their girlfriends—something much less common in male friendships.

2. Reconsider your “dream city”

Where you live…

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12 Status Symbols For 20-Somethings

Aiming for all these “elegant” additions to my lifestyle. 😀

Thought Catalog

In our 20s, most of us need to live very frugally. However, even those among us saddled with the most student loan debt in the most useless field has a day when they’re feeling rich. Here’s how we celebrate.

Going to the doctor

Every time you go to the doctor you can ride a chic-wave knowing that you’ve “made it.” Your illnesses can now be cured, moles checked and uncounted future diseases vaccinated. This is your moment to shine.

Household items

You remember the days of using ugly, inefficient cleaning items and dreaming of Swiffers and disposable dusters. Never in your life did you think you’d consider a vacuum cleaner a luxury item. And yet, here you are.

Pre-cut fruit

The mark-up on pre-cut fruit at the grocery store is insane. You can buy a whole package of fresh strawberries for $4 or you can buy the same size package…

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